More than one person in my life has told me I have a knack for finding things on the internet.
It’s surprising that a lot of people don’t really know how to utilize a search engine to it’s maximum capability. This entertaining video clearly explains how:
Web Search Strategies in Plain English from leelefever on Vimeo.
WASHINGTON (CNN ) — Republican presidential nominee John McCain has decided to travel to Mississippi to participate in Friday night’s presidential debate with his Democratic rival, Barack Obama, McCain campaign staff said.
Now, we could go on to call McCain a flip-flopper, someone who doesn’t stick to his decisions, but that would just be cruel. Funny, but cruel.
Good for McCain.
I think I saw a ghost on my way to work this morning.
So I’m driving along, and in the distance I see what appears to be a cardboard cut out, bathed in an eerie glow, standing on the side of the road. He really stood out against the backdrop of trees and foliage, wearing a bright orange shirt and khaki pants. His bright white shoes were sparkling, and he had one hand raised as if waving.
As I got closer, I realized that it wasn’t a cardboard cut-out. His hand still wasn’t moving, and the eerie glow was a solitary beam of sunlight that broke through a specific part of the trees. The closer I got, I realized that a lot of light was also bouncing off his teeth… he was smiling.
He had a unmoving smile and an unmoving wave. And as I passed, his head turned to watch me go by.
It was the creepiest drive to work I have ever had.
A person is smart. People are dumb, dangerous, panicky animals and you know it.
Agent Kay; “Men in Black.” And as I see it, why Obama is not miles ahead, even as his opponent dodges the debate.
I work as a software support technician, so I get phone calls most of my day from users asking questions about Microsoft Office.
I don’t know if it’s me or the universe, but recently the calls have been really… well….. eh, there are no stupid questions, right?
Example #1:
Them: “I tried to install Office Communicator, but now my Outlook is gone. I need my email.”
Me: “Your Outlook is gone?”
Them: “Yeah, the little icon is gone. Totally gone. Where did it go? Do I have to use Communicator to get my email now? I don’t like that.”
Me: “Try the Start Menu, Programs, Microsoft Office?”
Them: “Start menu? What’s—-oh! No, all gone.”
(The end result was that in trying to install Office Communicator, the user uninstalled Microsoft Office. That actually takes effort.)
Example #2:
Them: “Hi, my Outlook isn’t working.”
Me: “How so?”
Them: “I don’t know, it’s just not working.”
Me: “Are you getting any error messages? What exactly is it doing?”
Them: “No, it’s just not working.”
Me: “Can you at least start up the program?”
Them: “Which program?”
Me: “Outlook.”
Them: “I don’t know, let me try. [pause] Yes, yes, it works. Thanks so much.”
(I really have no idea what happened here.)
Example #3
Them: “Hi, I need to send an email but the buttons are gone.”
Me: “Which buttons, exactly?”
Them: “The send button.” [This happens, it’s a toolbar that sometimes gets turned off.]
Me: “Okay. Go up to the View menu, and then click toolbars, and then click the standard toolbar.”
Them: [Long pause.] “Okay…..”
Me: “See it?”
Them: There is no View menu. I see…. Page…. Tools….”
Me: “You’re using Outlook 2007?”
Them: [immediate] “Yes.”
Me: “And there is no View menu? It should be up near File and Edit.”
Them: “No, I don’t even see those.”
Me: [I hesitate to ask this:] “Are you sure you’re using Outlook 2007?”
Them: [frustrated] “Yes, it says Outlook Web Access 2007.”
Me: “Oh, so you’re using webmail?”
Them: “Yes.”
(How can you help someone who doesn’t know which program they are using?)
Example #4
Them: “Hi, I was working on a document yesterday in Word, and when I came in this morning I guess my computer had turned off overnight, because it was off, and I turned it back on and started Word and my file isn’t there.”
Me: “The file itself isn’t there? Or you can’t open it?”
Them: “No, the file itself IS there, it opens fine, but it doesn’t have everything I worked on yesterday. It looks just like it did when I opened it up for the first time yesterday.”
Me: “Uh-oh. Are you sure you saved the file before you left?”
Them: “Huh?”
Me: “Did you save the file? If you made changes without saving and then it crashed overnight, everything you changed wouldn’t have been saved. Unless you saved a different copy—”
Them: “Wait, that’s not automatic? You don’t save that stuff?”
Me: “Me?”
Them: “Yeah, don’t you guys back that stuff up? Can’t you just call up the backup copy and send it to me?”
Me: “Well, yes, the network is backed up but you have to save the file in order for…”
Them: “Look, either you’re backing stuff up or you’re not. I need the backup of this file.”
Me: “It, erm… doesn’t work like that.”
(In second grade I learned the motto: Save Early, Save Often.)
Most callers are friendly and polite, and some have really good, challenging questions. Some have really “dumb” questions but they are mistakes we have all made from time to time. Others are like the ones above. But there is about 5% of users who call as a last resort, treat you like dirt, and are actually surprised when you know the answer. I had one woman say, really condescendingly, “oh, wow, that actually worked. Ha!”
I don’t blame them, really. First, if you’ve ever called tech support in the “real world” before, you’re likely to know that tech support is even more clueless than you are 90% of the time. I’m guilty of this as well. And second, when the person who answers has a stutter, you automatically knock off 100 IQ points.
(Stuttering does not lower IQ, btw, it only lowers self confidence when you hear the person’s tone and vocabulary drop to accommodate your apparent lower brain function.)
The banner “Games for Windows” is both a good thing, and a bad thing.
A bad thing, because any game sold under that banner doesn’t natively support any third party controller. So the game controller I’ve used for the past two years isn’t compatible with the games I just bought, and won’t be compatible with GTA IV. That’s no good, I need a controller.
A good thing, because every “Game for Windows” natively supports the Xbox 360 controller.
A bag thing, because I do not have a Xbox 360 controller with a wire. They’re all wireless.
A good thing, because instead of buying another controller, I can get this wireless Xbox/Windows adapter for a lot cheaper in order to use my wireless Xbox contollers on my PC. This also means, if anyone ever wanted to, I can play 2 player on my PC.
I would rather just be able to use my regular old controller, but I suppose being able to use up to four wireless controllers and to have those controllers be compatbile for two gaming systems is pretty OK for $16. Find a controller better than the 360’s for less than $16 and I’ll show you a guy who doesn’t love Watermelon. And I’m a guy who loves his Watermelon.
John McCain has suspended his campaign due to the economic crisis, and likely won’t show up for Friday’s debate.
…
I sit here with my hands over the keyboard, wondering if I should even keep typing. That sentance kind of says it all.
Here’s a guy who is shielding his running mate from the press, lying about having to “rush back to Washtington” (so he could cancel on David Letterman only to appear with Katie Couric instead), and refusing to participate in one of the most important events in a presidential campaign that would take only 2-3 hours of his time on a Friday night.
WAIT!
He is not going to the debate?!
How how how does this man have the support of half of this country?
“It’s my belief that this is exactly the time when the American people need to hear from the person will be the next president,” [Obama] said in Clearwater, Florida. “It is going to be part of the president’s job to deal with more than one thing at once. It’s more important than ever to present ourselves to the American people.”
John, it is painfully obvious that neither you or your running mate have anything to say at the debate. For the past two years you clearly have not rushed back to Washington to save the economy, so why now? I suppose it has something to do with all the cameras being on you. And the sad thing? The 49% of people supporting you will likely see this as some kind of heroic, noble move.
You’ve even admitted the economy is not your strength.
So just take your nerve pills and stand next to Obama and answer some questions for a few hours. I promise he won’t go too hard on you. He won’t even talk about the internet, cellular telephones, or iCans. And before the debate, and right afterward, you can go and single handedly save the economy all you want. Meanwhile, your opponent will be standing up on stage all by himself… you know, because there is that whole election thing in about a month and it’s pretty important you let everyone know yer good ol’ voice-box still works.
“He can’t run the campaign because the economy is cratering? Fine, put in your second string quarterback, Sarah Palin. Where is she?”
“What are you going to do if you’re elected and things get tough? Suspend being president? We’ve got a guy like that now!”
—Letterman
“…how much longer I gotta read that thing?”
Hey Barack, who you pointing at? Nobody’s there.
Your opponent has dropped out of the race.
But somehow, he’ll still win.
Now, this is funny.
NOT because he’s gay. I don’t care about that. It’s just funny because, well… inside jokes, really.
I try not to bring up polarizing issues (I say this as I’m looking at the “I’m voting for Barack Obama” picture on the right), but I’m glad to see I’m not the only one who is infuriated by the government bailout of AIG.
A lot of times, I don’t make a firm stand on current events, simply because I feel like I don’t know enough about it. But I couldn’t help but get really angry when I heard the the government bailed out a failing insurance company. I still didn’t have facts or figures to back me up, and still probably don’t, but something in my gut just doesn’t feel right.
It just seems incredibly ridiculous. The people who are against things like universal health care use the argument that they don’t want their money going to pay for some guy’s car accident bill, or birth control, etc. But it seems to me that some of those same people (republicans?) are the ones who seemingly have no problem with their money being used to pay the debts of other people who were irresponsible with theirs.
If this thing passes (if? when? has it already?), the taxes you pay are helping to pay off some guy’s debt because he bought a house he couldn’t afford.
People will say that it was necessary, because we live in a global economy and if AIG went bankrupt it would lead to a global economic breakdown, etc. The thing is… and this is where I’ll probably differ from a lot of people… I think it kind of needs to happen.
The way our current system works is just too unstable. It’s no secret that the human species as a whole won’t survive much longer (much longer in the bigger picture, of course) living the way we do now. Perhaps a Great Depression size stock market collapse wouldn’t change everything, but it might at least knock everyday prices back to something reasonable when all is said and done, and get us thinking about things we “need” versus the things we “want.”
I’m not saying I live that way, but a Depression would probably change me, too.
Where am I wrong? Where am I right?
…pause for a moment, after placing two Excedrin pills in your mouth, to make sure before you swallow that one of them was not that plastic thing that they put in the bottle to absorb moisture?
I think you should always ask yourself, “If I was 8, would I hesitate to do this?
Great advice.
(via jakehurwitz)
This is hilarious. Looks like I’m not the only one who didn’t get the Microsoft ads. Apparently nobody did, so they’re blaming it on Seinfeld and getting rid of him.
It wasn’t until Jeff said “a commercial about nothing” that I got the concept of the ad, but even then, is the average viewer sitting on his couch, waiting to buy a computer, going to be both smart enough to get the “joke” and form a connection where none exists?
“Oh, Jerry! I love Jerry! Ah! It’s a commercial about nothing… like his show! I loved Kramer. But who’s this other guy? Bill Gates? He invented computers, right? Oh, the Windows logo! I love Vista! PC for me.”
Does anyone get the subject line of this blog? I find it a brilliant title. If you get it, let me know, because you’re awesome.
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